Finding the light again

I really do see my life as a CRAZY PLAY...

Since we got back to BRIT I haven't found the same Love that I had for it, just hasn't been there. The Spark felt like it'd gone. Felt like I had changed A LOT to attempt please more people and attempt to not offend so many people(well a few) and by doing that I found unhappiness in myself and STILL not pleasing people... made me want to just leave BRIT, finish the final major shows in January & just go cause there's no point in really staying at a place where you feel unhappy in the certain area/group thats supposed to be your comfort zone.

^^ I was just thinking about that all last night, then I had a random idea to go tomorrow(this morning) and attempt to get 1 of the 20 £10 tickets released at 10am for the AMAZING play Jerusalem By Jez Butterworth starring Mark Rylance.

So yeah I get there for 6.50am and there is a couple there who have camped over the night(well got there at 4am) so its literally just us 3 outside the Apollo Theatre in our sleeping bag, I later on meet a lady who just performed at the Globe Theatre in the production Faustus, but anyway...

This is a really bad blog by the way

BUT I saw Jerusalem and was literally flabbergasted by the play and the performances especially in Mark Rylance! it was ..... I don't know how to describe it and my determination to get tickets and camp out from 6.50am paid dividends as I got FRONT ROW MIDDLE SEAT TICKETS! So to see the performance and be right at the front was AMAZING! BUT yeah I just literally can't get over the performance of Mark Rylance its sooo INSPIRING!!! Like THE BEST PERFORMANCE I HAVE EVER SEEN! Never EVER seen someone so in character!

Such an INSPIRING performance it literally like SPARKED and RECHARGED my batteries! I was literally HOPPING around the bus stop like a kangaroo cause the feeling is bouncing up inside me! And I can gladly say I'm back! Regardless of if I'm pleasing people or not or if they are talking behind my back..

I'M BACK! I really dont care! I'm not going to let anyone have the ability to bring me down and prevent me from reaching the final goal...