Random Post....Felt like a mix between Martina Cole, Jackie Collins and Gandhi

So today's the 20th and I released these notes I used to keep on my phone to the world, the feedback was amazing, a lot of people felt they could relate to it and shit, how they had been inspired in different ways(felt like Gandhi), thats dope for me cause when I started writing these things they were purely for me on how I felt didnt ever think anyone could really relate and then  because I was bored on the tube,train,bus or because I waiting for someone and also because I wanted to write down these feelings instead of keeping all this shit in my head cause believe it or not sometimes it gets too much(lol) and writing shit down does help(never thought I'd say that) sound like some depressed kid lol.

This post is probably the weirdest one of all and it might not relate to as many people as the others, but have you ever felt like your career that you have chosen in my case acting, really don't wanna use this word but can't think of any others but distracts your social life or even has a grapple on it. Like your so busy with this dream and working on it in different ways that you can't always give people as much love and attention they want, weather it be your girlfriend/boyfriend or friend or even some cases family members, and they just don't understand when you try to explain to them?

I have this very problem now, where I be liking this girl alot, and there was a time where she was liking me but she said I didn't show her enough interest or didn't seem interested some ish like that, But that's never been the case she just didn't understand how busy I was, sometimes I get the impression no one does,and now she all loved up with someone....crap ass feeling cause I don't see myself with anyone else For now anyway, probably looks like a pretty weird ass and shit ass post but I feel like I needed to talk to someone at this moment in time and I came to you. Take a look at celebs they tend to be dating someone in and around the industry very few have succesfully had a relationship with someoene who is not in the industry, why? "were in two seperate worlds" "ours jobs clash" the execuse and reasons go on and on...Lol looking all love sick, but this kind of brings up the question can you only be in a serious relationship with someone who is in or around the same industry as you? Or can you naturally expect someone to just understand what your trying to do?

And sex gets boring too, when your constantly just fucking not even people you have feelings for but, just F-U-C-King weather it be slow sex or rough hardcore sex, her riding and screaming your name, asking for it harder and harder, her telling you to stop it hurts too much(not bragging lol) but it gets boring...that awkward moment when it's done and your putting your clothes on and she's on the bed lying down or in the bathroom...the awkward convo "okay, I'm gone" "nice meeting you" "don't tell no one" "that was mad" it gets repetitive. None of the lying on the bed side by side looking into each others eyes with the bed quilt sitting on your chest, holding hands none of that titanic romantic shit because you have no feelings for each other and after the sex you just want to get up and go, get the train,tram,car or bus and just go home...

I doubt this post is like beneficial to anyone or if anyone feels the same or whatever, but I guess the way I kind of look at things is work now have fun later? I use that saying but I lie at the same time cause I have loads of fun now lol....but like I asked earlier isit possible to be in a relationship with someone who is not in same position/industry as you isit possible for you to keep all your friends original and new in chase of this dream?...expect to hear a million people blatantly say yes it is...but actually think about it, take longer than the usual second, and dont come up with an extremely cheesy answer.. anyway back to watching the movie Blue Velvet reccomended by a friend of mine check it out pretty good, but extremely weird...